Chapter 2 : Missing September

When I text you, that means I miss you. When I don't text, that just means I'm waiting for you to miss me. I may not be the prettiest, smartest or strongest, but at least I'm me and I don't pretend to be someone that I'm not meant to be. I hate myself for still thinking about you. Over thinking is what kills you. Over thinking does kill your happiness. Sometimes you have to stop thinking so much, and just go where your heart takes you. I hate when I miss someone and can't do anything about it. I just wish you knew what I feel about you, thats it. I would be lying if I said I didn't miss you. I miss seeing your name show up on my phone. I miss how we used to talk every minute of every day & how I was able to tell you everything that was on my mind. I miss our conversations. I miss talking to the OLD you. No one's gonna love you more than I do. Everything about you is perfect.

It's better to let go with a smile, than to hold on with tears. I cared, you didn't. I cried, you laughed. I was hurt, you smiled. I moved on, you realized. Too late. To let go is to be thankful for the experiences that made you laugh, made you cry, and made you grow.Don't say you love someone if you don't. Don't make promises you can't keep. Don't bother if you never really cared. It shouldn't bother me, but it does. I shouldn't care about you, but I do. I should hate you, but I don't. I should move but I just can't. Be strong and smile to life even though it hurts sometimes. Worrying is a waste of time, it doesn't change anything, it just messes with your mind and steals your happiness. Admit it. I like someone that I can't have. You don't even know how bad I want you. I wish you could understand the way I feel about you. I want our relationship to be like Tom and Jerry. No matter how many times we fight, we won't be apart. 

sometimes, i just want to sit outside with someone and talk all night. It all comes down to the last person you think of at night. That's where your heart is. I love you more than I did before. Everyone wants happiness, No one wants pain, But you can't have the rainbow, Without a little rain. Sometimes it's not the pain that makes you suffer, it's your own negative thought that makes things seem worst. When i sad "I'm fine" doesn't usually mean that at all. Sometimes you have to stop worrying. Have faith that things will work out, maybe not how you planned, but just how they're supposed to. Please have faith no matter what.

I wish we could go back to how we use to be, I miss that. Sorry for trusting you, I won't make that mistake again. I just need someone who won't give up on me no matter what. Don't find love, let love find you. That's why it's called falling in love, because you don't force yourself to fall, you just fall. When you love someone, even though they hurt you and break your heart, you still love them with all the little pieces. The more you care, the more it hurts. I'm young, but I've been through a lot. Sometimes you just have to accept that some people can only be in your heart, not in your life. Sometimes i wish i could read your mind. But then, i wonder if i could handle the truth. Sometimes, all you can do is laugh to keep yourself from crying. You make me smile for no reason, you make me laugh at unfunny things, but most of all, you make me love you when I shouldn't be loving you. I'm fall too fast, crash too hard, forgive too easily, and care too much. I'll stay as long as you don't push me away. I just miss you. It's as complicated, yet as simple as that. I can go days without talking to you, months without seeing you, but not a second goes by that I'm not thinking about you. I wish I could lose these feelings as fast as I lost you.




For every day, I miss you. For every hour, I need you. For every minute, I feel you. For every second, I want you. Forever, I love you. MOHD FAZRINSHAH (FAFA)